Blog - what do you need to revise on your drafts

Blog post due -- what do you need to revise on your drafts to show more clarity, conviction, commitment, emotion, and overall strengthen your performance. Be specific on what you need to revise and why. 300 words. Due by midnight

For our group, our themes are love, struggles between parents and child, and identity. In order to show the identity, we give Eric a monologue to show how does the identity affect characters in US. While we have that monologue, we do not actually have an ending for that. I think we should add one more scene for the conversation between Mom and Eric. By doing this, I think the story line will be much more clear. Also, we can use this scene to show the theme: struggles between parents and child. Because at the beginning of the story, Mom has a huge argument with Caroline that Eric is not the right person to marry. So in scene three when Mom accidentally breaks the teddy bear, which was a gift sent by Eric, mom and child's relationship are at rock bottom. But in our original drafts, this does not have a conclusion, and mom and Caroline's relationship just suddenly becomes better at the final scene. This is too abrupt and I think we need a transition. By adding one more scene after Mom's monologue, it will be much better. After the monologue, Mom can just directly contact Eric. During the conversation, Mom can give a new teddy to Eric and ask him to give it to Caroline. This act can be seen as Mom accepts that Eric is her son in law. And the relationship between parents and children will be better. This also shows the family love in Caroline's family. At the beginning of the story, Mom does not accept Eric is because she wants her daughter to have a better life. But later on she finds out that Caroline truly falls in love with Eric, so she compromises herself and accept Eric. Buying a new teddy bear shows that Mom now accepts US's things, which means she accepts her daughter's identity.